- Write snappy headlines that include no information. Link those headlines to a four-hundred word article which, if properly edited, would be two sentences long.
- Make people who try to read your website on a mobile phone dismiss a request to install your App. Every. Damn. Time.
- Include multiple, paid links beside every article. Do not label them as “paid”. Better yet, apply a misleading label like “Articles Recommended for You.”
- Write lots of top-N lists and implement them with slide shows.
- Hijack the “Copy” function of the web browser so that anyone who tries to quote a single line of the article will paste in twenty lines of garbage.
- Share buttons. Everywhere!
- “Syndicate” your posts so that “marketers” can re-use them in their “content marketing” efforts.
- Create articles that consist of nothing but twitter conversations and snappy commentary. Report on said conversations as though they were news.
- Be outrageous. Failing that, be outraged. Failing that, be snarky.
- Ensure good search engine placement by making the URL of each article more/informative-than-the-headline-or-body.
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